15 November 2005

Chirac égaux Carter

Well, well, well. Now we have it don't we?

Jacques Chirac the so called "President" of france is really Jimmy Carter in drag. In an article in the Wash Times he has cited "profound malaise" which is apparently a step up from the regular "malaise" cited by the peanut farmer cum President of near 30 years ago. Very much like the internet funny going around for a while now, that everyone has seen, about how france is changing their terror alert status from "run" to "hide" with the next levels being "surrender" and "collaborate" .

" . . . President Jacques Chirac said yesterday that more than two weeks of violence in the poor suburbs of [F]rance is the sign of a "profound malaise" and ordered measures to reach out to the angry rioters. . . "

Chirac plans more socialism as a means of "reaching out" to the disaffected. What he needs to be "reaching out" with is a pair of handcuffs and a deportation notice. Not an apology and another program. Don't you get it Jacques? They don't want your charity disguised as socialism. They want you and the other french people to get out of their country, "french-i-stan".

By the way Jacques, be sure leave the codes for your nuclear arsenal on your desk on the way out. Why would Iran go to all the trouble of building nukes when france can be rolled so easily, then they can have their nukes?

It is looking more and more like we are going to have to liberate france yet again. This time, I say we annex it as the 51st state and call it "New France". It would take some political backbone in this country so my plan may not be feasible, but it surely would be the right thing to do. You can't hang on to your country; fine, we'll come bail you out. Ask Kuwait. The french know this, we have already bailed them out twice.

You can't hang on to your country three times, we get the pink slip.

I can hear how that phone call goes now.

Bush: Hey Jacques, how's it hangin'?

Garbled response, furious hand waving.

Bush: You need what good buddy? You lost your country again? Jacques. Jacques. They burned the Louvre down? The Marines? Well they are kinda' busy as a matter of fact; but for what you descibe a few platoons ought to do, but listen, the American people have really had about enough of this this time.

It is really pathetic that an acceptable measure of the health of the french state is how many cars were burned last night. As though it is some sort of de facto market indicator of the french body politics last gasps.

"And this just in from france...only 284 vehicles were destroyed by torch wielding thugs last night down from 374, world markets rallied on the good news"

Think I'm being sarcastic? Read this qoute from the WashTimes piece.

" . . . Overnight, the number of car burnings -- a barometer of the unrest -- dropped again, with hoodlums setting fire to 284 vehicles, compared to 374 the previous night, police said yesterday. No clashes between police and rioters were reported. "The lull is confirmed," national police spokesman Patrick Hamon said. A week ago, 1,400 cars were burned in a single night . . . "

The lull is confirmed . LOL

"Houston, we have a lull."

If it weren't so pathetic and utterly terrifying it would be funny. I suppose it's just me. I suppose I am somewhat lacking in nuance. I mean I went to college and even graduated, it must be that I am lacking in sophistication; or, is that sophistry? -SpinDaddy